Honoring a Muggle Tradition
by CrazieDasie
Summary: What else is there to do on Halloween but go trick or treating? Slight SBRL. One shot.


**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters, events and/or places that are recognized as being written and created by J.K. Rowling. J.K. Rowling owns all the characters and places from the Harry Potter books including the ones used in this story.**

A/N: HAPPY HALLOWEEN :D

* * *

It was one of those mornings where one could sense just how cold it was outside. By the slight chill in the otherwise warm room, by the whistles and rattlings behind the tall windows, by the fact that it was the end of October. And it was just so warm in bed. Comfortable. A cocoon. 

Remus felt content and heavy as he snuggled his face into the warmth of his blankets. He never wanted to move. Exposing even a finger to the outside world would only assist in cooling his warm little hole. Once he was even a tiny bit cold the whole effect would be ruined. He'd have to get up for a jumper and returning to bed just wasn't an option after that; he'd be forced to start the day.

Besides sensing how cold it was, Remus could also sense the foreboding fog of mischief and mayhem and plotting in the air. He could feel it. Remus sniffed. He could _smell_ it. It smelled like muddy grass and dust and gingerbread. Actually it smelled really, kind of, good.

"Moony?"

Remus's eyes snapped open. Everything was unfocused or maybe Sirius was just sitting too close.

"Stop ignoring that you're awake. And wake up." Sirius tapped Remus's forehead. "I can almost see that little brain working."

"Maybe you'd see it if you pushed your face a little closer, Sirius. Oh, wait! You can't possible _get_ any closer."

Sirius growled and rolled away from Remus. "Ha ha, Prongs. You told me to wake up Remus!"

"Wake up," Peter said, launching his lumbering form onto Remus's bed, or actually onto Remus's poor leg which was merely minding it's own business and didn't deserve to have 200 pounds of boy crushing it. "Prongs said _wake_ up, not _feel_ up."

James laughed, shaking Peter's hand. Remus yanked his foot out of Peter's butt whimpering in pain both physical and mental.

"Alright, alright," Sirius yelled. Remus, who was momentarily staring unseeing at Sirius's thigh, snapped his eyes up to Sirius's face. A spark zipped through his body when he noticed Sirius's pink tinged cheeks. But then he thought he saw a bright, round, orange pimple on Sirius's ear winking at him and assumed his pupils were just still in sleep mode.

James tisked and sat down next to Remus's knee. "Calm down, Padfoot. Wormtail has such few witty moments; I _had_ to laugh at him. For propriety's sake, if anything."

Remus squirmed onto his back so that he could address his glare towards James instead of Sirius's elbow. "Why is everyone in my bed?" Remus asked.

"That's right. Because I'm calling a Marauder meeting."

"Why _my_ bed though?" And Remus thought his bed was a safe haven.

"Oh!" Sirius squealed, sitting up abruptly. "Are we gonna finally chose offices? Because I better be given Official Group Mascot!"

"Wow," James said. "Anyways, no. Halloween. The meeting is about Halloween."

"Halloween?" Peter looked down at his hands, counting something on his fingers. "That's not for another two days."

"Precisely," James shouted. "We only have two days to plan!"

Remus sat up, rubbing his eyes. "Can we do this somewhere else? Besides my bed?"

"What did you have in mind, Prongs?" Sirius's face lit up. "Slytherin-flesh eating Jack-O-Lanterns?"

James opened his mouth, closed it and rubbed his chin. "How would we get them to only recognize Slytherin-flesh?"

"No!" Remus cried, throwing his hands over his face. "No detention! Please! Padfoot told me there would be no more detentions."

"Yeah, because James is Head Boy."

Remus sighed in defeat. Why did Halloween have to exist, he thought. Or why couldn't they celebrate like Muggles? He really, really wouldn't mind seeing Sirius dressed up as Tarzan or a scantly clad native or just naked, actually.

James's foot kicked Remus back into reality. This meeting was only succeeding in one thing so far, reminding Remus about what he _usually_ did first thing in the morning. He tried not to look at anything belonging to Sirius. Tried.

"Flesh eating pumpkins might get a little messy," James said. "I want to do something fun!"

"Go trick or treating then," Remus yawned, his eyes automatically closed, searching for more sleep.

Remus's comment was followed by crystal clear silence. For a moment he thought he might have gone suddenly deaf and he couldn't understand how someone's ear drums could just suddenly cease to work and opened his eyes with manic panic. His friends were staring at him.

"Is something wrong?" Remus asked. "Oh. I can hear that."

"What's trick or treating?" James asked and his voice was so innocent that there was no questioning his seriousness.

"What's…? What's trick or treating?" Remus sputtered, looking at each boy in turn. "None of you know what _trick or treating is_?"

All three shook their heads.

"We've been through six Halloweens together and trick or treating was never once mentioned by any muggle-born? _Ever?_"

James made his infamous I'm Really Thinking Give Me A Moment It Hurts face. "No, Remus. But, that whole trick part is awfully intriguing."

"I wouldn't mind a little treating," Sirius leered at his own fingers.

Remus took in each blank face again. "Really?" he asked. He was surrounded by the two smartest seventh years in the whole school, and Peter, yet intelligent conversations where all parties were coherent occurred less and less each month.

A sock hit Remus in the left eye. "Are you going to tell us what trick or treating is?"

"If you put your sock back on," Sirius told Peter, handing the dirty foot garment back.

"Alright." Remus sat up and cleared the morning from his throat. "On Halloween, Muggle children get all dressed up and go from house to house-"

"Like in dress robes?"

"No! You've never…no. Dressed up in _costumes_. They pretend to be monsters or characters and-"

"I don't see the point."

"James! Let me finish. The _children_ dress up in costumes and go house to house yelling trick or treat. Then the owner of the house gives the children candy."

"Like candy? Real candy?"

"No, Padfoot. They get that elusive fake candy that's been going around lately."

"Wait a minute." James sprang off of Remus's bed. He pointed a finger down at Remus, throbbing with accusing indignity. "You're telling me that Muggles roll themselves in toilet paper, knock on some idiot's door, and _get candy?_ Remus nodded, and counted down the seconds until the explosion. "That's insane!"

"16 seconds."

"Why didn't we know about this?" James started pacing and twirling around Remus's bed.

"We could have gotten so much free delicious candy," Peter whined. He clutched his stomach like it was already beginning to make room for too much chocolate.

Remus hauled himself into a sitting position. "There's no point for us, _Wizards_, to go trick or treating."

"Why not?" Sirius flipped onto his stomach, staring up at Remus like it was story time.

"Because of the costumes, really, I suppose. The most popular Muggle costumes are Witches and Ghosts and…Werewolves, for example. Those things _exist_ in our world. Obviously."

"Remus?" Sirius put his head on Remus's stomach. "Teach me to be smart like you."

Peter snorted. "He can't work miracles, Padfoot."

"OK, lads," James shouted. He was pacing and mumbling to himself for the past couple of minutes, and the new light in his hazel eyes could only mean one thing to Remus. He had an idea. "It is settled. Trick or treating."

Remus, who was holding his breath ever since Sirius decided to use him as a pillow, unclenched his stomach to begin his usual ritual of trying to talk his friends out of something. "And where do you plan on _going_ trick or treating?"

"Hogwarts, of course," James shouted from his trunk, where his head was currently buried.

"And whoever, Professor or student, doesn't offer up candy-" Sirius sprang to his feet, rubbing his hands together.

James stood up and turned to face him. "Will wish they did."

* * *

It was Sunday. Glorious Sunday. Remus sat in the common room thanking every deity he could remember that it was Sunday and that tomorrow was Monday. Monday when they'd have to resume classes, meaning that _Sunday_ was reserved for finishing up homework. There was scarcely time for anything else. 

Tomorrow, besides being Monday which was even more glorious than Sunday, was also Halloween.

Remus looked down at his book and began rehearsing his sad face. Any minute Sirius and James would come mopping over to his chair, whining about how there was no time to organize their stupid Halloween plan and all was lost and ruined. Sirius might need a hug. Remus _loved_ Sunday.

"Man, I have so much homework to do," Peter sighed, plopping down at Remus's feet. He waved a plump hand in front of Remus's face. "You don't even have to say it, Remus. I should have listened to you and got my work done earlier."

Remus laughed. "Well, good thing you have all day to get it done." Remus looked up as the portrait swung open.

Sirius and James lumbered into the room. James was walking backwards, facing Sirius, both stepping at a curiously slow pace. To onlookers it appeared that James and Sirius were trying to mimic some odd form of dance, but of course, Remus knew better.

"Oi," James called, nodding his head at Remus and Peter. Remus watched transfixed as James and Sirius somehow managed to get up the stairs, until Peter tugged at his sleeve to get up.

"You know, there were probably a dozen other less obvious ways for you two to smuggle something into the dorm."

Sirius glared at Remus. "Next time come with us then. I know you didn't have any homework!"

"I'm not aiding your illegal adventures!"

"It wasn't _illegal_, and you never help anyways!"

"Pete, once mum and dad stop arguing, can we open our presents?"

Sirius rolled his eyes, grabbed Remus's tie and dragged him over to where James and Peter were sitting.

"Did you really bring us presents?" Peter asked, poking at the invisible heap of something in the middle of the room.

James shrugged, eyes alight with giddy excitement. "Pads and I did a little sneaking into Hogsmeade, did a little talking to that broad that owns the dress shop and got our hands on these!" With a dramatic flourish James tore his invisibility cloak off the pile to reveal four large shopping bags.

"Costumes!" James and Sirius shouted.

"No," Remus whispered.

"Oh, yes, Moony love," Sirius purred, wrapping an arm around Remus's shoulders. "Don't think just because Halloween falls on a Monday that we're going to cancel our plans."

"What do I get to be?" Peter squealed, jumping to his feet.

James ripped into one of the bags and pulled out an eye patch. He flung it at Peter, who immediately put it on. "You're the Exam Pirate, Wormtail. Pillaging and plundering anyone who'll give you test answers!"

"Argh," Peter laughed. "And what are you dressing up as?"

James pulled something out of a different bag, and quickly put his back to his friends. After a few seconds of muffled swearing, James peeked over his shoulder and smiled, exposing two long fangs.

"He just wants to ask Evans if he can suck her blood."

"Padfoot," James shouted, falling into peals of laughter. "I can't fool you." He sat up, pulling the fake teeth from his mouth. "Show them your costume."

Sirius bent down into a third bag and pulled out a sparkly gold halo, which he fixed around his head.

Remus couldn't remember hearing Peter and James laugh any louder.

"Pad…foot," Peter managed to say. "Who you trying to kid?"

"That's what I said!" James said, dropping his body over Peter's.

Sirius looked down at them with smug indignation. Remus tried to look at anything but Sirius; because even if he didn't act like an angel, he certainly looked like one. "I'm not _saying_ I'm an angel," Sirius shouted over James's and Peter's dying laughter. "The whole point of putting on a costume is to dress up as something that you aren't. Otherwise Remus could just be a Werewolf!"

"Oh, oh!" James suddenly sat up, pointing at Remus with one hand and grabbing Peter's shoulder with the other. "I forgot! Show Remus his costume."

Curiosity getting the better of him, Remus crawled over to Sirius. Sirius reached into the last bag and pulled out a shiny pair of red horns. He stuck them on Remus's head. Remus heard a loud thump behind him and half silent choking sounds. But he didn't care if Peter and James were virtually throwing up with laughter because Sirius picked him out a matching costume and Sirius was smiling at him arranging his Devil horns and Sirius leaned back and whispered "Perfect" when he was done.

"That's that, mates," James said, removing his fogged glasses. "Trick or treating commences after tomorrow's feast!"

Peter flipped down his eye patch. "Argh!"

* * *

Remus tried. One more slice of turkey. One more glass of pumpkin juice. One more piece of cake. He ate slowly. Tiny bites. Chewing and chewing until the morsel of food dissolved in his mouth and escaped down his throat. He was aiming to be the last person to finish his dinner, the last person to leave the Gryffindor table, the last person to leave the Great Hall even. 

Remus tried; but utterly failed. James and Peter were basically inhaling and swallowing whole every item of food on their plate. Sirius finished his plate even faster, and blocking out the rest of the universe, took up feeding Remus. Shoveling food into his mouth and glaring at him until he swallowed it.

Which is why Remus was actually the fourth, and not the fourth _last_, person to leave the Halloween Feast.

Remus smacked his forehead. "I should have faked an illness." He looked at his reflection. "I'm so excellent at faking illnesses." If he faked an illness then he'd be wrapped up in his bed cocoon instead of standing in the bathroom dressed head to toe in red spandex. Remus had never felt more uncomfortable in his entire life, and he woke up naked and disoriented once every month.

Sirius slipped into the bathroom, shutting the door behind him. His costume was far less revealing than Remus's. Sirius had on a sort of toga in silvery blue that came to rest on the middle of his thighs. Two long, pure white feathered wings were fastened to his straight muscular back. His feet and calves were dressed in gold criss cross laced moccasins, and his hair shined black and thick under his golden halo. Dressed like that, Sirius could murder someone in front of Dumbledore and still be judged innocent. He was enchanting.

Remus wanted to cry. Mostly because he was _wearing spandex_.

"Are you almost ready, Moony?"

"Sirius…" Remus twisted his still unattached pointy Devil's tail in his hands, looking at Sirius through his reflection. "I can't go anywhere dressed like this!"

"Oh! Oh, yeah." Sirius produced something red from behind his back. "You must have dropped this. It's like…it goes over the…"

"Thanks," Remus mumbled grabbing the cover and pulling it over his head faster than he'd ever manage to move ever. "That's better. I guess."

Sirius sighed, grabbed Remus's shoulders, and forcefully spun him around. "Moony, you can _try_ and have fun for once. It is allowed, you know."

"Parading around in red spandex is fun?"

"You want to trade?"

Remus shook his head.

"There's no pleasing you, Remus Lupin." Sirius snatched Remus's tail away from him. "Turn back around so I can pin this on you." Remus did as he was told, clearly aware that having Sirius touch his hips and butt wasn't helping anything. "I thought getting you a costume that went with mine would make you comfortable. Prongs wanted you to dress up as Little Red Riding Hood."

"Glad to know that I'm one big joke." Remus cursed himself as soon as his mouth closed. He wanted to blame his nerves for why he was being grouchy and mean, but he knew the truth. If he kept up being the downer, Sirius would tell him to not bother coming; and he was really hoping that would happen.

Sirius went still behind Remus, his hands frozen in trying to pin down the tail. "You know that's not true, Remus. I wish you'd stop saying that." Remus felt Sirius's hands fumbling behind his back again. "There you go," Sirius said, stepping away.

Remus turned around to face him. "Thank you," he said. "I don't know what I'd do without you."

Sirius's angelic face turned instantly into stormy fury. "Moony, I know what you're doing. This is our last Halloween at Hogwarts. You can cry, you can offer me sexual favors-" Sirius paused, as if he was waiting for Remus to actually proposition him. When Remus did nothing but stare back with slight amusement, he continued. "You can try and fake an illness, nothing's going to work. You're coming trick or treating with us, and you're going to have fun, even if I have to physically or magically force you."

* * *

"I can't believe you did that!" Sirius howled crouched on the floor outside Gryffindor tower. 

"That's what Dracula does, Sirius!"

"True, Prongs," Remus said, trying to shake Sirius off of his leg. "But, Lily might have appreciated being asked first. Given the fact that you're _not really Dracula_."

"I don't think I'll ever forget her face," Peter whispered, trying to force down his own laughter.

James, for some reason Remus would never understand, thought it would be brilliant to sneak up on Lily and pretend to suck her blood. He thought she'd swoon. He thought she'd at least recognize him. Instead, as soon as Lily looked at James's white face and bloody fangs she screamed "Vampire", threw a book at him, and bolted from the room.

James of course also bolted from the room, before Lily could realize that it was just Potter making an ass of himself again and not Dracula come to drink her blood.

Inconsequently, "We didn't even get a chance to get any candy from anyone," Peter pointed out. "And now we can _never_ return to Gryffindor Tower."

"Then let us move onto the Hufflepuffs," Sirius said, leading the way down the stairs.

* * *

"Trick or treat!" The four boys, (actually, Remus was just mouthing the words), screamed in front of the entrance into Ravenclaw Tower. They had to give up on the Hufflepuffs when five minutes passed and no one came to the door. 

Peter huffed, and shook his empty candy bag. "Why isn't it working?" He bent his knees and inhaled deeply. "TRICK OR-"

"Hello."

"…treat. Hello."

Julia, a seventh year Ravenclaw prefect, stared at them. She was flanked in the doorway by almost every other sixth and seventh year Ravenclaw. "You four do realize that Wizards don't go trick or treating?"

Sirius shifted his weight and held his candy bag open; he secretly hatred Ravenclaws and their uptight know-it-all-ish behavior. "Are you going to give us candy? Or are we going to have to trick you?"

Julia looked behind her and nodded. Two male Ravenclaws stepped forward and dumped handfuls of candy into Sirius's bag. "That's all we have," Julia stated.

Sirius snapped his bag shut.

"Thank you for participating," James said, bowing dramatically and Dracula like.

"Yeah," Sirius continued. "You birds are alright!" Julia rolled her eyes and slammed the door on them. Sirius turned to the group. "Never liked the lot. Onward!"

* * *

"Trick or treat!" 

Remus looked around terrified, and impulsively grabbed Sirius's arm. "I think we took a wrong turn."

"Nonsense, Moony. TRICK OR TREAT!"

"Padfoot…?"

"Yes, Prongs?"

"Moony's right. This isn't Slughorn's office…"

"TRICK OR TREAT," Sirius shouted again. The office door in front of them began to open.

James inhaled sharply. "It's McGonagall's!"

"That's correct, Mr. Potter," McGonagall said, folding her arms across her tartan clothed chest. "Can you explain to me why you four are not only out of bed, but causing a ruckus throughout the school?"

"It's Halloween," Peter squeaked.

"That I am aware of, Mr. Pettigrew."

"We're being festive?" James straightened his back. "Actually we're going trick or treating to spread acceptance and honor a Muggle tradition."

McGonagall stared at him, slowly raising her eyebrows. "Well, then, perhaps you can write me an essay about that?"

"Perhaps," James mumbled, sending evil eyes toward Sirius.

"Professor?" Peter asked, stepping forward.

"Mr. Pettigrew?"

Peter looked over at James, swallowed, and continued. "Are you going to give us candy?"

Professor McGonagall looked like she was turn between shock and amusement. After a couple seconds of simply staring and watching Peter sweat under his Pirate's bandana, she raised her wand and summoned a small bowl of candy. "I do believe, Mr. Potter, that you are the first Head Boy to receive not only one but four detentions during his school year."

"Next Saturday?" James asked, closing his candy bag.

"All of you. Next Saturday." The four of them nodded, and turned to leave. "Oh, wait! Black? Lupin? I think you may have your costumes mixed up!"

* * *

"Remus! I'm sorry!" 

Remus was livid as the four boys stood outside the wall that led into Slytherin. Now he hated Halloween even more. Detention! He had _detention_ and all because Sirius could never think before opening his big stupid mouth.

"I'm sorry," Sirius whispered for the ten millionth time. "I didn't know it was her office until it was too late!"

"Ready?" James said, pulling Sirius away from Remus.

"Yeah. One…two…"

"TRICK OR TREAT!"

The wall into Slytherin parted immediately and Severus Snape stood front and center, right behind him was Sirius's brother Regulus, and right behind him was practically the entire Slytherin house.

"Well?" Sirius completely forgot about getting Remus to forgive him and only had eyes for his two sworn enemies. "What will it be? Trick? Or treat?"

"You all look ridiculous," Snape sneered. "What is Pettigrew supposed to be? A blimp?"

"At least this is my costume, Snape," Peter piped up, but sliding behind James nonetheless. "What's your excuse?"

Sirius felt something tug at his insides when he saw Regulus biting down on his lips, trying not to laugh.

"Are you going to give us candy, Snivellus?" James asked. "Or face the consequences."

"We're real scared, Potter," Regulus spat. "What you going to do? Have Sirius throw glitter on us?"

"That's it," Sirius hissed, any minuet feelings of remorse gone in a flash. "Hope you like flesh eating pumpkins, little brother!" And with that Sirius, James and Peter threw handfuls of small, teeth baring gourds into the Slytherin common room.

Remus stood witnessing the whole horrendous thing until Sirius grabbed his hand and pulled him down the hall.

* * *

"TRICK OR TREAT!" 

"Sirius," Remus whispered, mouth practically touching Sirius's ear lobe. "You can let go of my hand!"

"Are you still angry at me?"

"No."

Sirius turned his head to glare at Remus. "I'm not buying that for one second. TRICK OR TREAT!"

"Well, what do we have here?" Horace Slughorn said with jovial mirth. He wobbled slightly out of his office.

"We're going trick or treating, Professor," Sirius pointed out.

"Wonderful!" Slughorn patted his stomach, overcome with laughter. "Oh, you four are always up to something. Now let me see here…Pettigrew's a pirate, yes?" Peter nodded, looking more like an overexcited eight year old boy rather than almost eighteen. "Oh, and Mr. Potter…don't you make a scary vampire." Slughorn peered over James and Peter. "And….Black and Lupin…lovely to see you two are finally going public."

"What?" Sirius asked. Remus held their clasped hands in front of Sirius's face; he didn't think a higher plain of aggravation existed, but apparently, once again, he was proven wrong.

"Anyways, Professor," James said, shooting curious glances at Sirius and Remus. "Trick or treat, you know, it means that you have to give us candy."

"Oh, well, I'm very sorry boys, but I don't have any candy."

The four of them deflated at those words.

"_Accio crate!_" Slughorn shouted. "Would you take a fifty bottles of butterbeer instead?"

* * *

"Would it be ok," James spoke up as the four began their journey back to Gryffindor tower. "To state that this didn't exactly pan out like we imagined?" 

"We hardly got any candy at all," Peter whined. He stopped in his tracks. "Want to go to Dumbledore's office?"

"Want to be expelled?"

"He'll think it's funny!"

"Want to be mauled by a Werewolf?"

Peter stopped talking and continued walking.

"At least we can get severely drunk and forget this whole waste of time ever happened," James said. He was already a quarter into his first bottle. The night was young. And he desperately needed to forget about practically scaring Lily's hair white.

Peter sighed audibly. "I still want more candy, though. Those Ravenclaw pricks gave us junk."

James shrugged, and took another sip of butterbeer. As he brought the bottle up to his lips, and tipped his head back, he couldn't help but finally notice Sirius. He was walking in front of him, oddly silent, watching Remus's stiff retreating back like a puppy that was just smacked with a newspaper. James felt bad for reasons he didn't quite understand, and decided to do something.

"Hey, guys?" James stopped walking, grabbing Peter's arm. With obvious reluctance both Sirius and Remus turned around. "Take the butterbeer upstairs," James said to Sirius. "Wormtail and I are going to go trick or treating Marauder style."

"You're going to steal from Honeydukes?" Remus asked. James nodded. "Grab me some of those chocolate cherry bombs."

* * *

As soon as Remus stepped foot into the dorm, he de-devil-ed himself and crawled into bed. 

Halloween was over.

And from it he gained one unfair detention, and was soon to suffer from the world's worst stomach ache once James and Peter returned from their raid.

Meanwhile, Remus had plans. Plans that involved resting and forgetting; he inhaled, _resting and forgetting_.

"Trick or treat, Moony!" Sirius's quiet voice interrupted his chant.

"Neither," Remus said, still fuming at Sirius; and himself.

Sirius stuck his head into Remus's bed. "You can't pick neither, Moony. That's not the Muggle way!"

Remus sighed, pulling himself into a sitting position. "I don' have any candy for you, Padfoot. Peter ate mine on the way up."

"No candy? Well, then_, take that_!" A small, bright orange Jack-O-Lantern flew into Remus's bed. Remus could see its little mouth moving, before he screamed for bloody murder.

"Sirius! Is this a flesh-eating pumpkin!?"

"No…" Sirius drawled. Remus stopped flailing about, just in time to watch the pumpkin make-out with his wrist. "It's a flesh-_kissing_ pumpkin."

"What?" Remus laughed.

Sirius crawled onto Remus's bed. "But, it only kisses the flesh of a Moony."

"Charmed squash isn't going to get me to forgive you for landing me into detention, Sirius." Remus was lying through his teeth; and he knew it.

"Happy Halloween, Remus," Sirius said. "You little devil."

And when Sirius kissed him, Remus couldn't imagine getting a better treat.


End file.
